WTF is up with this being Super Bowl “50”.  To hell with that, this is Super Bowl L!!

Are you aware of this?  This, my friends, is the official logo for the Super Bowl this year:

What the hell is that big 5-0 doing on there?  Last time I checked, this was still America, and we use Roman numerals for the Super Bowl!  Americans didn’t win WW2, we won WWII.  The next time a Republican gets elected president it will be WWIII, not WW3.  Because this is America, and Roman numerals mean something!

I’m sorry, but I take substantial pride in knowing my Roman numerals, and I won’t apologize for that.  I know the M’s and the C’s, the V’s and the X’s, all that shit.  I know where to stick the smaller letter when you need to subtract a year, or when to drop a letter on both the left side AND the right side of the main letter.  

Plus I have sooooo been looking forward to this.  Think of how messed up the numbers have been for the last ten years.  XL was kinda fun, because that is also my sweatshirt size.  But then we had all the years when the I’s would build up on the right side of the L, and then get busted up by a V or an X.  The pinnacle was Super Bowl XLVIII, with the X on the left taking 10 off the L, and the VIII adding 8.  Then the next year another X gets in on the action so that we have Super Bowl XLIX, with an X on the left taking away 10, and the X on the right adding 10, but not before he got 1 subtracted from his ass.  How fun is that?

But in all this Roman numeral chaos, there was L this whole time, just patiently waiting for his time to shine, for his day in the sun.  For ten years he has put up with the X’s and V’s and I’s shuffling around, knowing that one day he would stand on his own, and be the lone representative of the greatest sporting event of the year.  But then he is cast aside, replaced with regular old numbers that any idiot can read.  

Super Bowl X?  Remember that one?  I don’t, but the point is that it was Super Bowl X, not Super Bowl 10.  X had his time to shine.  Why not L??  So unfair.

In view of this outrage, I have gone to the trouble of redesigning the logo as it should have been designed in the first place.  (Note the subtle shadow to the right and below the L to give it the floating effect.)  Pretty solid graphic, I think.  You’re welcome.

And here’s to L!!  You will always be my 50.  Hope they bring you back for Super Bowl LI.