Buckle up Bitches because it is time for me to start dropping my Top 10 lists for 2016! To start things off, lets go with my Top 10 Movies of 2016.
First off, some rules. This ain’t ‘Nam, after all.
A. Allow me to be the first to say that these are definitely not the BEST movies of 2016. I must have seen the movie at the theater in order for it to make the list. And looking back on 2016, I didn’t see that many movies, apparently, because I had trouble coming up with 10 movies for the list. But then again, if I didn’t hear about a movie, and then make the effort to go see it at the theater, it probably wasn’t any good anyway. So maybe this is a list of The Best Movies of 2016.
Secondly. The movies are ranked IN ORDER. As every premiere blogger knows, any list of the “best” must be ranked IN ORDER. That’s just standard industry practice and not even reasonably debatable by honest persons. Otherwise, all you have is a random collection of shit thrown against the wall to see what sticks. *cough,* or whatever.
Lastly. Let’s get on with it. Idyt’s list of the Top 10 Movies of 2016.
10. Suicide Squad
This movie actually sucked. Made no sense whatsoever. Two hours that I won’t ever get back. The only positive thing about Suicide Squad is that Margot Robbie was extremely hot, blonde and kinda scary, which seems to hold a certain attraction for me, if we are being honest with one another. Regardless, I needed 10 movies and this was the last one I could think of that I saw in 2016.
9. Independence Day: Resurgence
This movie pretty much sucked too. However, I am a huge fan of the original, and enjoyed all the references and callbacks to the 1996 classic of the same name, minus the Resurgence part. Who among us can forget that speech by President Whitmore before we fought for our freedom, and not from tyranny or from oppression, but for our very existence, our right to LIVE!! We did not go quietly into the night, and did not vanish without a fight. We celebrated our INDEPENDENCE DAY! Not quite as good in 2016, that’s for sure, but it gets the 9 spot.
8. War Dogs
War Dogs was mediocre at best. But that fat guy is kinda funny, and it is a sorta true story, so it makes # 8.
7. The Magnificent 7
I don’t remember much about Magnificent 7 because I was kinda drunk when I saw it, and enjoyed a few more beers at the movie. What a great development that is, am I right? Beer at the movies! And I’m not talking about a paper cup neither, but a glass of beer! (Pulp Fiction reference, duh.) Anyway, I do remember that I thought my dad would have liked it, and the seven spot seemed appropriate for obvious reasons.
Arrival was OK. I actually liked it better the first time I saw it as a kid when it was called Close Encounters of the Third Kind.
5. The Girl on the Train
The Girl on the Train was actually pretty good. Definitely a chick flick, but my daughters invited me to go with them one Saturday afternoon, and I didn’t have anything better to do, and they served beer, as previously mentioned. Ended up being a pretty good movie. Never can tell who is the good person and who is the villain, and a surprise twist at the end. No regrets seeing The Girl on the Train.
4. X-Men: Apocalypse
I am a big fan of the X-Man movies, although I get confused on where we are in time compared to the other movies. If I don’t see them with Jake, I am totally lost. Apocalypse was not one of the better X-Men movies, but still pretty good.
3. Manchester by the Sea
I have not actually seen this movie yet, but I will before the year is out, and it looks pretty damn good. All the people who know anything are saying it will win Oscars and such. And it looks like it is about a guy trying to take care of a moody teenage and also date the babes, a scenario to which I am sure I will relate. Probably will shed some tears too, and I don’t care who knows it.
2. Hell or High Water
Although I missed it at the theaters, I am going to make an exception and include this movie on the list because it was awesome. Caught this one a couple weeks ago on PPV. Great story about two guys robbing banks, and Jeff Bridges trying to catch them. The Dude never disappoints. Two huge thumbs up Hell or High Water.
1. Rogue One: A Star Wars Story
Haven’t seen this one yet, obviously, because it doesn’t come out until tomorrow. But Jake and I have our tickets for tomorrow night at 11:00 p.m., and I am confident it will be the Best Movie of the Year. All the critics are saying it is great and, hey, it is STAR WARS. Can’t wait to see it!